Guest Expert: Dr. Nicole Kearney on Navigating the Emotional Journey of Infertility
Infertility is a deeply personal and emotionally challenging journey affecting millions of couples worldwide. As a naturopathic doctor, I have worked closely with many couples facing this difficult reality. As someone who has also struggled with infertility, I know how taxing the journey can be on individuals and couples. Beyond the physical aspects, it is crucial to recognize the profound emotional impact of infertility on individuals and their relationships. We will explore the emotional effects of infertility from a naturopathic standpoint, offering insights and support for couples on this challenging path.
Overwhelming Sense of Loss
For couples navigating infertility, the dream of conceiving a child may seem unattainable, leading to a profound sense of loss. This emotional weight can permeate all aspects of life, affecting self-esteem, relationships, and overall well-being. Know that you deserve to have providers who can provide a compassionate and supportive space where you can express your feelings and be heard without judgment.
Anxiety and Stress
The relentless pursuit of fertility treatments, doctor visits, and uncertainties about the future can trigger anxiety and stress. The constant rollercoaster of hope and disappointment can affect mental health, causing sleep disturbances, mood swings, and a sense of helplessness. I encourage mindfulness, relaxation techniques, and counseling to help couples manage stress and regain balance.
The Strain on the Relationship
Infertility can place immense strain on a couple's Relationship. Feelings of guilt, blame, and inadequacy may arise, leading to misunderstandings and communication challenges. I emphasize the importance of open and honest communication between partners. Additionally, counseling can provide a safe space for couples to address their emotions and strengthen their bond during this challenging time.
Grief and Isolation
Experiencing infertility can lead to feelings of grief and isolation. Watching friends and family conceive effortlessly can intensify these emotions. As a naturopathic doctor, I encourage couples to connect with support groups or seek counseling to share their experiences with others who understand their journey. A sense of community can offer comfort, empathy, and validation during this isolating period.
Self-Identity and Purpose
For many individuals, the ability to bear children is closely tied to their sense of self-identity and purpose. Struggling with infertility may lead to questioning one's worth or place in society. Couples must explore their passions and interests, helping them discover new sources of fulfillment and purpose in life.
Coping Mechanisms
As a naturopathic doctor and someone who has experienced infertility, I understand the emotional toll it can take on individuals and couples alike. Alongside the physical treatments, addressing the emotional aspect of infertility is crucial for overall well-being and resilience. My approach focuses on providing personalized and holistic care, acknowledging and validating the emotions that arise during this journey. Occasionally I also use herbs and supplements to support mental-emotional health. Together, we can navigate this emotional journey and work towards building a healthier and happier future.
Below are five things you can do to support your mental and emotional health through this journey.
Maintain blood sugar balance.
Nutrition and blood sugar balance is one of the first things I focus on in my practice regarding mental health, but it’s also VERY important for hormonal health. That’s why I’m providing the most information here. Below are some tips for ensuring that your blood sugar is balanced. Balance blood sugar. Creating balanced meals that combine all three macronutrients can help maintain steady blood sugar levels throughout the day.
Carbohydrates have the most significant impact on blood sugar levels. Focus on consuming complex carbohydrates with a low glycemic index, broken down more slowly, leading to a gradual rise in blood sugar. Sources of complex carbohydrates include whole grains (e.g., brown rice, quinoa, oats), legumes (e.g., lentils, chickpeas), and most vegetables. Limit or avoid refined carbohydrates and sugary foods (e.g., white bread, pastries, candies, sugary beverages) as they cause rapid spikes in blood sugar levels.
Protein in your meals can help stabilize blood sugar levels and promote satiety. Protein slows down glucose absorption from carbohydrates, preventing sharp spikes and crashes in blood sugar. Incorporate lean protein sources such as poultry, fish, tofu, beans, and Greek yogurt into your diet. These options provide essential nutrients without adding excessive fat or carbohydrates.
Healthy fats play a role in blood sugar regulation by slowing down digestion and the absorption of carbohydrates. Additionally, healthy fats are crucial for overall health, including brain function and hormone production. Choose sources of healthy fats, such as avocados, nuts, seeds, olive oil, and fatty fish (e.g., salmon, mackerel). Limit or avoid trans fats and saturated fats in processed and fried foods, which may contribute to insulin resistance.
Aim for meals that consist of…
Complex carbohydrates (e.g., whole grains, vegetables) for a steady energy source.
Protein (e.g., lean meat, plant-based protein) to slow down carbohydrate absorption.
Healthy fats (e.g., nuts, olive oil) enhance satiety and blood sugar control.
2. Prioritize self-care
It can be easy to feel down on yourself but try to show yourself some extra love during these times. Do the things that fill up your cup and bring you joy- dancing, seeing friends, exercising, meditating, taking a bath, reading your favorite book.
3. Rest
Get 7-8 hours of sleep each night and practice sleep hygiene techniques like keeping the room dark, avoiding screens before bed, and letting go of the day. This will help you sleep more and support your hormonal, mental, and immune health.
4. Reach out for support
Connecting with a therapist for 1:1 therapy or couples therapy can be very helpful in providing clarity and support on your journey.
5. Take breaks when you need to
As hard as it can be to take breaks when you wanted to get pregnant a long time ago, I find it helpful for some couples. My patients occasionally need to take a month off from taking supplements, counting cycle days, tracking ovulation, following a diet, etc. I, too, found myself needing breaks for my mental health. I support these breaks and have seen them be exactly what couples need to reach their goals.
Dr. Nicole Kearney, ND, is a licensed Naturopathic Doctor practicing in Burlington, Vermont. She uses a holistic approach to helping her patients achieve wellness. She specializes in hormonal health, fertility, and gut health but also sees various conditions. She is excited to launch her new Natural Path Fertility Program, an all-virtual, self-led series covering her unique approach to optimizing her patients' fertility by focusing on the foundational aspects that cannot be overlooked.